I decided , after two boys, that having a life is a prevlaige ! Yes moms
Either you like it or not, that's the truth. I'll be as honest as it can get.
I'm not saying that you can't have a life if you have kids, I think you can't have a life as long as you have babies. I'm not sure where my world begins or ends anymore, at mom's ,at the mall , the playing area,have no doubts!!! Or in their beds tucking them ... Pretty much that's it, maybe a movie if I got lucky... And my girls day out, if not half of them are delivering, expecting or not having a life!!
But the good news is , I'm not sad or prettying myself.
moms who chose not to have a life I bet , they are the happiest! Aren't you? repeating.... the ones who chose!
Dear moms , if you feel like you are loosing something by staying home and raising your kids , you are not. It's the other way around.
I know you care about the image, the outer image of you that people see... That you are not hip anymore, not out all the time, you didn't know the latest restaurant and coffee shops in town! You are not out everyday to work, doing something a thousand people can do , but you are doing it instead of staying with your babies...
Harsh?? Ya I want you to rethink your life.
If you think that the world is turning to a trashy place to raise your kids in, if you think that new generations are not good enough, if you think things are going out of control for teenagers, if you think society is switching to an unacceptable set of morals.
I think the main reason for that is the lack of continuous guiding and supervising for our kids, this problem can be solved only by parenting, and that needs parents or at least a parent!
And I think the worse is yet to come... Sometimes I just can't believe my eyes... When I'm at a play ground and I'm Acctually the only mom with her kid, the 5 other kids will be with a maid only!
I'm not against maids , no! They are a bless , but for home chores, cleaning dishes, washing stuff, keeping everything nice a clean.... But they are not babysitters! They are supposed to clean the mess, and help you, so you can take a better care of your baby.. Got it?
If you really want to do that , at least get a babysitter !
As long as you are not helping poor people who can't get their own food, or on a peace boat preventing killing, or trying very hard to save someone's life by inventing medicine , or helping your husband financially because you can't live properly without your monthly payment. Nothing really worth leaving your kids everyday, five days a week, at least 5 hours a day!! Personally I think it's madness.
you will be doing the world a big favor taking care of your own kids, putting things in the right place.
I don't want you to end your life, what I'm trying to say will be ( if you think that you have to have a goal in your life, you want to achieve something, you want to fulfill your purpose of being alive, and pay your dues, because you are a responsible person who adore achieving.
Start with your kids, if you succeed with them, believe me, your whole life is waiting, you will be successful anytime , when you want to, successful people always find their way, don't worry )
Meanwhile, work from home, read a lot , learn something new, a language , develop a skill, volunteer , help your mom, homeschool your preschooler, draw, cook, a million thing you can do, don't be a lazy , unsophisticated lady because you are a mom, you should be everything because you are a mom, people will not only respect you,they will envy you ...
Time will come , when you will leave everyday all day, now,enjoy what you can't afford to miss ...
With all my love to working moms, no offense, it's an opinion after all.
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i personally think u r one of the great moms i know, u hardly ever leave ur kids, just like me, but u top me in that when ur with them i rarely see u snap at them or lose ur mind like i do, i totally agree with u in everything that u said, but for me it was so harsh to realize that my space (the me time ) is so limited, i blame 'em for that most of the time, im 80% of the time screaming , which makes me wonder is the time im giving them really a quqlity time? im sure it is not, sometimes when i go to a doctor's appointment and get back i feel that i missed them so much that it eases me the whole day, so i think it is important to get out , have a space every now and then to recharge.
ReplyDeletefinding smt u have a passion abt is very important as well, for me it is excersising every day, sometimes with my girls, it helps , so moms find urselves in that crowded scheduale of urs, if u can't , cut some errands and make urselves a place.. love u all, and manoor ... i respect u girl
excuse my invading to the mom blog.. but I cant resist reading one of the most sophisticated and complicated lady words.
ReplyDeleteTotally agree... Not because I'm a man.. In fact men like to see their wives fresh and happy and not nagging 24/7 (which is impossible by the way)so men prefer their wives to work if that what makes a wife a lady.
But reality; women work to escape.. Since escaping is the easiest solution.. so they chose it...
As you said if you don't have to do it, I don't know why they do it....
please moms be responsible and raise those kids, otherwise give them to people who wants kids...
Sinan
i agree ! its strange how some people see that being a stay at home mom is something forced on u or that u lost ur life being that..
ReplyDeletei learned the hard way that its not! i was always lost feeling that way that i have to do something else! since i was the only one married with a baby between my friends!el7amdullilah now i am not alone and all of u are mommies so i feel much more related to all and i really settled down to the idea that i dont want anythimg ELse! I believe that what i do is the most rewarding thing to my self and being me ya Allaaah sho erta7et :)i cant imagin anything else to do coz i tried it and BElIEVE me nothing is worth u missing the moments ur kids grow infront of u!
but still i dont judge any woman or mom on her way of choosing her life and how to raise her kids coz Allah onlY knows what shes going through no one else know her feelings deep inside..
i think we all have our everyday struggle and no one is perfect ..Allah knows the struggle i go through everyday to give my kids their rights without a2sar 3ala 7ad and i feel sometimes that i fail :s
i strongly believe that every mom should have help wether its from the husband.family or a maid to keep her sanity and for the sake of her kids and should have a break from them ;)
am Dina mother of 3 Eyad,Abed alra7na and Mena ;)
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